- Kanye West Do I really have to even explain myself? No one thinks you are a genius or wants your opinion so please shut your mouth sooner rather than later. Every time you give him the benefit of the doubt, he proves you wrong and yet again confirms he is a raging asshole. I mean he is marketing "leather jogging pants" for God sakes?! Need I say more.
- Gender Reveal Parties Let me explain myself before I make all my child bearing friends mad. I just attended a gender reveal party for one of my best friends. (Sorry, Shea!) It was fun, and I did anxiously await to find out the gender. Nevertheless, these parties are still completely unnecessary and a waste of money. A work friend told me someone in her neighborhood had a gender reveal party that involved a helicopter?! I might eat my words, but if I ever become pregnant and have a gender reveal party, slap me in the face.
- Save the Date Cards Since we are talking about a waste of money, stop sending save the date cards to remind me about your wedding. They already have a "save the date card" it's called an invitation. You know the thing you send out 4-6 weeks before the wedding?
- Spoiled Children I work with children on a daily basis and I am amazed how disrespectful children have become. When did it become acceptable for children to talk back and tell their parents what they are going to do? Apparently, now it is OK for a child to slap, kick, hit, spit in my face, etc. and the response to be laughter or "See how he/she does?" Yes, I see how he or she does because you chose not to parent your child. If I spat in someone's face as a child, my ass would have been jerked up so fast there would have still been saliva on my face. Get it together, America. Teach your children manners. I don't care how you do it. And for that matter stop over indulging them; your 6 year old doesn't need an iPhone.
- Obamacare I mean even if you drink the Obama Kool-Aid you have to admit that Obamacare was and is a hot mess. But don't worry I'm sure Mr. President will work out all the kinks because everything the government runs works out fantastically. Right? :)
- Sarah Palin Is she still even relevant?! Don't you feel foolish America? You almost elected this woman vice president who went on to have a reality television show about living in the wild in Alaska. I remember Tina Fey once said, "I think she is a little bit smarter than me and that's just not good enough." Please talk all your colloquialisms back to Alaska for good.
- Organic Food "I only eat grass-fed beef. I can't eat gluten. I only eat organic vegetables." Organic food is the new black. Did you know Stanford University actually did a study that confirmed there was actually little health benefits from eating organic foods? It can be found here . If you want to pay twice as much for food that doesn't have any more health benefits than conventional foods, go ahead. I ain't got time for that.
- Decaffeinated Coffee Unless you are over the age of 60 there is no need for this. If you don't want to drink caffeine then don't drink coffee. The caffeine is the best part!
- People Who Still Think Guns Kill People If you took all the guns away in the world people are still going to kill people. People are sick or evil and do horrible things; things that are hard to understand. However, taking away guns or tighter gun control laws are not the solution. I mean do you think the inner city gang member that has a semi-automatic weapon purchased it legally at the local gun store? If so, I ain't got time for you either.
- Voicemail If you leave me a voicemail. I won't check it. It will sit in my phone until I decide to do a mass delete in which I probably won't even check it then. All phones, well almost all phones, have caller ID now. I see you called and will call you back; no need to leave me a voicemail to "call you when I get a chance".
Hope everyone has a good long weekend! Happy Memorial Day!
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